Global Social Issues

Want to Raise Successful Children? Avoid These 4 Phrases

Casal dels Infants – Successful children grow up in supportive environments that consistently shape positive character from an early age. What they hear and see from those around them is deeply recorded in their memory. The behaviors and words they absorb every day will influence how they think and act in the future. That’s why it’s crucial for parents to be mindful of their words and actions in front of their children.

Margot Machol Bisnow, an American author and parenting expert, interviewed 70 parents who successfully raised successful children into thriving adults. Through these interviews, she discovered several phrases that these parents consistently avoided saying to their children. Here are four phrases parents should avoid if they want to raise successful children:

“You can’t play after school until your grades improve.”

Many parents focus too much on academic performance without truly understanding their child’s interests and passions. In reality, play is an essential part of a child’s learning process. Through play, children learn how to socialize, create rules, and make decisions.

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Forcing children to study continuously without giving them space to play can actually hinder the development of their social and emotional skills.

“We’ll give you money if you get good grades.”

Rewarding children with money for academic achievements is not the best way to motivate them. When parents place too much emphasis on grades, children may lose their natural curiosity and love for learning.

Children should be supported in exploring various abilities and interests, not just academic success. Achievements matter, but character development is far more valuable in the long run.

“We don’t trust you, so we’ll check and fix your homework.”

Constantly checking and correcting a child’s homework can make them feel distrusted. Parents should instead encourage a sense of responsibility and allow their children to learn from their mistakes.

John Arrow, founder of Mutual Mobile, shared that when he was in fifth grade, he and his friends published a school newspaper that quickly sold out. Unfortunately, they failed to fact-check, which angered the school principal and got his friends in trouble with their parents. However, John’s parents laughed and simply encouraged him to fix his mistake.

“Knowing my parents would support me, even when the school was upset, made me work even harder to prove they had made the right decision in trusting me,” John said.

“We’ll give you extra allowance so you can buy whatever you want.”

Spoiling children with excessive allowances can create bad habits. Children may grow up without learning to delay gratification or manage money wisely. In the long term, they may become less responsible and easily frustrated when things don’t go their way.

Instead, parents should teach their children the importance of saving, managing finances, and working towards their goals. These lessons will help children grow into independent, emotionally mature individuals.

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